[Self] Love in the Time of COVID
Guys, I hate to say it but it’s a really crazy time out there right now. I live in Seattle, so I am right in the heart of the COVID-19 outbreak in the states. I also work in clinical setting and I feel like I’ve been both in the thick of things and living in a bubble where life has just been going on with some added craziness.
But I know that lots of people are feeling uncertain and scared (rightfully so), frustrated (again, rightfully so) and maybe even going a little stir-crazy already. I’m about to begin my own work-from-home stint, which is great for my dog but not so great for me. Honestly, the older I get, the more of an introvert I become. I crave my alone time, but I also need some human interaction every once in awhile. And most of the time I get that at work. When I am not with a patient, I usually seek out my colleagues, chatting and joking. I love to make people smile and laugh. I am good at it. So as much as I crave alone time, I also crave the connection and interaction that precedes the need to recharge. I felt very, very sad leaving my office yesterday knowing it would likely be a long time before I went back.
And I am very familiar with the impacts of loneliness- both on mental but also physical health.
So, before I get too in my feelings about what this means for me — let me just say, I’m there. I feel it. This is a crazy time. It’s a scary time. Maybe you’re feeling anxious or super stressed out. Maybe you’re wondering how the hell you’re supposed to at-home-yoga between all the cans of beans and rolls of toilet paper your husband is stockpiling [how nice for you].
But maybe this is a time for us to practice the hard part of self-compassion.
Self-compassion!? you might be saying. WTF that gotta do with COVID-19? Shouldn’t I be worried about the elderly and the sick, and the people on the front lines? Yes, yes, yes. Sure.
But don’t forget to check in and offer up something to yourself. (I say this as much for me as for you.) Notice what’s bubbling up for you. Are you scared? Are you sad? Are you feeling really, really fucking stressed out because your kids have the next 6 weeks off school and you’re supposed to work from home? Of course you are.
So breathe. Pause.
[Here’s where that hard part comes in.] Remember that those feelings are what make you human. And that those feelings, which feel hard and painful and scary sometimes, actually connect you to humanity and a greater sense of community. (I told you it was hard.)
You are not the only one feeling scared, or unsure or isolated. You’re not the only worrying about if you have enough soup or toilet paper or hand santizer. Or if you’ll be able to go on that vacation you planned or if your parents or baby will be OK. Remember that. Remember there are tons of other people feeling similarly. See if you can find a way to connect to that.
So that even if you’re socially distancing, you can also connet. Start with connecting to yourself, and then see how you might connect to something outside yourself.
